Coldplay are deeply uncool

I saw Coldplay in the year 2000 in the Olympia Theatre in Dublin. They were young men like me, my contemporaries actually. I stood near the stage bathed in the glow of Chris Martin’s spot-light my mind switching between enjoying the gig and being really Jealous. Girls all around me, including the one I was with, where over come with status fever, and to a girl were imagining getting boned by Chris Martin. That was the day I decided to learn a guitar and start a band…only joking I did fuck all and spent the rest of the decade masturbating.

I enjoyed the follow-ups to Parachutes, Rush of blood and X&Y, they were the soundtrack of my 20s and still stand up in my opinion. Then came Viva la Vida or Death and All His Friends – I bought the CD, imagine that ! and gave it one listen, it wasn’t a grower, not that I’ll ever know, I took it out of the player and frisbeed it into the bin. This was Nu Coldplay, their Fluro years.
Ask yourself this, has any band in the history of music ever tried to start a fashion and literally nobody followed it, nobody!

The bay city rollers had people wearing Tartan pants for fuck sake. But I digress, this Fluro fashion they and nobody else on this planet thinks is cool has lasted from 2008 up to the present day! and the vast majority of their songs have been shite aswell. What happened to the dressed in a black misery of Rush of blood to the head? has the ever been a stylist more in need of a sacking???

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